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Borderline Personality Disorder and False Sexual Assault Allegations

Borderline Personality Disorder and False Sexual Assault Allegations

Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is a complex mental health condition characterized by pervasive instability in moods, behavior, self-image, and functioning. Individuals with BPD often experience intense episodes of anger, depression, and anxiety that can last from a few hours to days. These mood swings can lead to impulsive actions and unstable relationships.

What is Borderline Personality Disorder?

BPD symptoms can vary, but the most common include:
  • Fear of abandonment: Intense fear of being left alone or abandoned, leading to frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined separation.
  • Unstable relationships: Relationships that are intense and short-lived, often swinging between extremes of idealization and devaluation.
  • Unstable self-image: Rapid changes in self-identity and self-image, including shifting goals and values.
  • Impulsive behaviors: Dangerous behaviors such as reckless driving, substance abuse, binge eating, or spending sprees.
  • Self-harm: Recurrent suicidal behaviors, gestures, threats, or self-mutilating behavior.
  • Emotional instability: Intense mood swings, with episodes of severe depression, irritability, or anxiety lasting a few hours to a few days.
  • Chronic feelings of emptiness: Persistent feelings of being bored or empty.
  • Inappropriate anger: Intense anger or difficulty controlling anger, often followed by shame and guilt.
  • Stress-related paranoia: Severe dissociative symptoms or paranoid thoughts that are transient and related to stress.

Causes of Borderline Personality Disorder

The exact cause of BPD is not fully understood, but it is believed to result from a combination of genetic, environmental, and social factors. These may include:
  • Genetics: A history of BPD or other mental illnesses in the family.
  • Brain structure and function: Abnormalities in brain regions related to emotion regulation, impulse control, and aggression.
  • Environmental factors: Traumatic life events, such as abuse, neglect, or separation in childhood.
  • Social factors: Unstable family relationships, exposure to chronic invalidation, and high-conflict environments.

Diagnosis and Treatment

Borderline Personality Disorder And False Sexual Assault AllegationsBPD is typically diagnosed through a comprehensive clinical evaluation, including a detailed interview and assessment of the individual’s medical history. Treatment often involves a combination of psychotherapy, medication, and support from family and friends. Effective treatments for BPD include:
  • Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT): A type of cognitive-behavioral therapy specifically designed for BPD, focusing on teaching coping skills to combat destructive behaviors.
  • Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): Helps individuals recognize and change distorted thinking patterns and behaviors.
  • Medications: Antidepressants, antipsychotics, or mood stabilizers may be prescribed to help manage symptoms.
  • Support groups: Peer support groups can provide a sense of community and understanding.

False Allegations of Sexual Assault and BPD

False allegations of sexual assault are a serious issue with significant legal and social consequences. While the majority of sexual assault reports are truthful, a small percentage are false. Research suggests that certain personality disorders, including BPD, may play a role in the likelihood of making false allegations.

Understanding False Allegations

False allegations of sexual assault can arise for various reasons, including personal vendettas, attention-seeking behavior, or psychological issues. The impact of a false allegation can be devastating, leading to wrongful convictions, damaged reputations, and emotional trauma for the accused and their families.

Connection Between BPD and False Allegations

Individuals with BPD may be more prone to making false allegations of sexual assault due to several factors related to the disorder:
  • Fear of Abandonment: Individuals with BPD may make false allegations as a way to manipulate others or prevent perceived abandonment. This intense fear can drive them to extreme behaviors to secure attention and support.
  • Unstable Relationships: The instability in personal relationships common in BPD can lead to intense and volatile interactions. False allegations may arise from a desire to retaliate or gain control in these tumultuous relationships.
  • Impulsivity: BPD’s impulsive nature can lead to hasty and ill-considered actions, including making false accusations without fully considering the consequences.
  • Emotional Dysregulation: The emotional intensity and rapid mood swings associated with BPD can result in distorted perceptions of events and interactions, potentially leading to false allegations.
  • Identity Disturbance: Individuals with BPD often experience confusion about their identity and self-image, which can contribute to inconsistent and unreliable narratives about personal experiences, including allegations of assault.

Case Studies and Research

Several studies have explored the relationship between BPD and false allegations of sexual assault. These studies highlight the complex interplay between the symptoms of BPD and the behavior of making false accusations. For example, a study published in the Journal of Forensic Sciences examined the characteristics of false allegations of adult crimes and found that individuals with BPD were overrepresented among those who made false accusations. The study suggested that the emotional and relational instability of BPD could contribute to the likelihood of making false claims.

Legal and Social Implications

False allegations of sexual assault have far-reaching legal and social implications. For the accused, these allegations can lead to criminal charges, loss of employment, and severe reputational damage. Even if the accused is eventually exonerated, the social stigma can persist, affecting their personal and professional life. For individuals with BPD, making a false allegation can also have significant consequences. They may face legal repercussions, including charges of filing a false report or perjury. Additionally, their actions can undermine genuine victims of sexual assault, making it more challenging for them to be believed and receive justice.

Addressing the Issue

Addressing the issue of false allegations in the context of BPD requires a multifaceted approach:
  • Education and Awareness: Increasing awareness about BPD and its symptoms among law enforcement, legal professionals, and the public can help understand the complexities of false allegations.
  • Mental Health Support: Providing comprehensive mental health support for individuals with BPD can reduce the likelihood of false allegations. This includes access to therapy, medication, and support groups.
  • Legal Protections: Implementing safeguards within the legal system to thoroughly investigate allegations and protect the rights of the accused while ensuring that genuine victims are supported and believed.


Borderline Personality Disorder is a challenging mental health condition that can influence behavior and interpersonal relationships. While the majority of individuals with BPD do not engage in making false allegations of sexual assault, the symptoms of the disorder can increase the likelihood of such behavior in some cases. Understanding this relationship is crucial for providing appropriate support and ensuring justice for all parties involved. By raising awareness and offering targeted interventions, it is possible to address the complexities of BPD and reduce the incidence of false allegations.

Below is a transcript from the video: Borderline Personality Disorder and False Sexual Assault Allegations

Are you falsely accused of sexual assault, child abuse, or anything else? By a loved one or former girlfriend or wife? Have you ever been? If you’re watching this video and you have been falsely accused by a former spouse or loved one girlfriend if you’re watching it, have you been? Have you been falsely accused by a wife or ex-wife and ex-girlfriend or someone else that you had an intimate relationship with either sexual assault, military sexual assault, rape, child abuse, or anything of that nature? If so, then watch this video. Please subscribe below for more content and updated videos weekly. Please click subscribe below so you can get notified every time we put out a new video on military law and military sexual assault. Please click below so that I can notify you every time we put out a new video on military law.

Military False Sexual Assault Allegations

It’s not uncommon for people formerly in a relationship like a husband, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend, or roommate to be falsely accused by their former lover or the former partner or someone they had a close relationship with. If there’s a divorce or a child custody case on the line, then there’s even an increased chance that you would be falsely accused of some sexual assault, rape, domestic violence, or even child abuse, or even child molestation. And I’m talking falsely accused, meaning you didn’t do it. There’s even something called sexual assault in divorce that’s been widely studied.

Sexual Assault Allegations in Divorce

It’s common in almost every country in the world, and it has been heavily studied in the United States, Britain, Canada, and Australia. They use an acronym. It’s SAID, sexual abuse or sexual assault allegations in divorce. It’s so common for people to make allegations against their husband or ex-husband. As part of a divorce or child custody case that there’s an acronym for, and there are experts who go around the country testifying on behalf of people that are falsely accused. So how does someone come to accuse someone else of sexual assault? You know, that didn’t do it, you know, a former lover or former spouse? One of the biggest factors that we see is if the person suffers from mental illness. Now, if you’re watching this and you hate men, and you’re supervised, you’re probably thinking, Mr. Waddington, you’re a terrible person. You’re calling women crazy. No, I’m not. What I’m referring to is women who are, in fact, mentally ill, who suffer from some psychological disorder, and who falsely accuse ex-boyfriends, ex-lovers, ex-spouses, ex-husbands, whatever, of things to punish them or to gain an advantage in some sort of a divorce child custody case, or just to make their life miserable.

BPD False Accusations in Military Sexual Assault Cases

We’ve had over 20 years. We’ve had dozens and dozens and dozens of cases where ex-wives, after the divorce or during the divorce, will use false sexual assault allegations against their husbands. This is very common in the military when the husband is either going to divorce them, move out of the house, or refuse to increase child custody, payments, or child support when the husband seeks to alter child support payments for child custody agreements. Four of our 12 contested jury trials have involved spouses in the past year alone. The problem is that spouses like that, the mentally ill ones to make allegations, are very dangerous because they can gather evidence against you to plant evidence. They know you so well, and they have access if you’re in a relationship, boyfriend, girlfriend, or husband-wife situation.

Borderline Personality Disorder and Military Abuse Cases

They know pretty much everything about you. They have access to your bank records and your social media records, and they share a bed with you. It isn’t hard to plant evidence to say, hey, on this night, nine months ago, or three years ago, I was raped; we went to a party I had too much to drink, and he forced me, and I never told anyone because no one would believe me or I did it for the sake of the children. So I didn’t report the rape. I kept living with him until he filed for divorce for various reasons, and then I decided to report it. We get that all the time. So one of the primary mental illnesses that people who make false sexual assault allegations and false sexual assault allegations in military cases military sexual assault allegations are people who suffer from some personality disorder, and the primary one is usually borderline personality disorder.

Girlfriend with Borderline Personality Disorder Will Haunt You for Years.

Now, if you are a loved one or in a situation where you have a crazy ex accusing you of things you didn’t do, I strongly recommend that you seek legal counsel number one; number two, you need to read a book called I hate you don’t leave me, this is a book about borderline personality disorder, people that have that psychiatric illness, and that suffer from it and how to deal with them and how to avoid them and how to spot them. This book was eye-opening for me; you know, I read it a few years ago. I wish I had read it 20 years ago when I was first getting started in military law and dealing with military sexual assault cases and court-martial cases. Because that book is about borderline personality disorder, people described in that book hit the nail on the head for many of my cases.

Read the book “I Hate You Don’t Leave Me.”

It gave me great insight when cross-examining those alleged victims, usually their fake victims. And it gave me a lot of insight into helping my clients, advising them, and helping them see the light. And to avoid those situations of getting involved with borderline personality women in the future. I’ll tell you of all the cases we’ve done, talking to 1000s of cases over the past 20 years that we’ve been involved in. It is primarily women who have borderline personality disorder who are accusing their husbands. According to the literature, both men and women suffer from borderline personality disorder. However, women who have a higher are more likely to have it. I don’t know what the statistics are now. Still, it’s considerably more women than men have other personality disorders. For example, narcissistic personality disorder is higher in men, and antisocial is higher in men, which is a whole other video and another topic.

Borderline Personality Disorder and Fake Rape Accusations

In this video, I’m talking about people falsely accusing other people of military sexual assault with borderline personality disorder. So what are some factors to look for if you’re dating or involved with someone, and you’re wondering whether or not they have a borderline personality disorder, and if they do, you are at risk? So that the number one fact thing that you’re gonna see with someone who has borderline personality is the number one thing you’re going to see with a person with borderline personality, personality disorder, is there, they’re hot and cold. They’re there. Their temperament and their demeanor are hot and cold. So if you go to a bar, and you meet someone attractive, and they’re having fun, and there, there’s like a ball of joy, and they’re very sexually making advances at you and all over you and telling you how good you’re looking, they make you feel great. And they’re willing, ready, and willing to go from zero to 60 in the relationship. Next, you know, they’re moving in with you, you’re planning vacations, you might even be married, and they’re plotting how they will adopt your children. Once you get divorced, although you’re having a weekend TTY affair, in their minds, they’re ready to move in and marry you and take over your life and replace your ex-wife, who is still married to you, by the way. And the problem is this. Those things heat up fast with these types of people. And they get cold and violent and aggressive very fast. And you’ll start to see clues. And it’s usually super hot. They’re so hot. You can’t resist the passion and the joy of being around this super lively super.

People with Borderline Personality Disorder Often Fabricate Rape Accusations

In the DSM-V, they’re also very promiscuous and very sexualized. So they’re beautiful to a lot of military men that are looking for some excitement. And they’re also notorious for breaking up marriages because a lot of men will go for these types of women who are generally very appealing to them at the outset; they might have a wife who is at home taking care of the kids, you know, a lot of times marriages get into a rhythm, which is normal. But there are then many of these service members who meet someone over the weekend who is just so much fun and so exciting. So sexualized, they feel alive again, until the Monday morning after, when they tell the person, “Hey listen, I gotta go back to my wife. I like you, but we can’t continue.” Then you end up with a stalker because one of the biggest tours of someone who has a borderline personality disorder is their fear of rejection and how they respond to rejection. That’s one of the main things that psychologists and psychiatrists look at when diagnosing someone with this disorder. How do they deal with rejection? And it doesn’t have to be just the rejection of a lover. It could be a friend’s rejection because sometimes you have a woman-on-woman tax that happened from a borderline to a random friendly met. But first, I’ll deal with a woman who is borderline attacking a lover or someone she just met or hooked up with. When you tell them it’s time to go, Thank you for, you know, I enjoyed this, or I gotta go back to my life.

Ex-lovers with Borderline Personality Disorder will Destroy Your Life.

They will start again, getting very aggressive, very defensive, very manipulative, some emotions, and some will get violent. And then they may or may not accept the rejection, the more advanced ones will plot out a way to re-interact with you, you might get a phone call after the weekend affair that you had said, hey, by the way, I think I’m pregnant. Or I forgot to tell you, I think I might have an STD, or you left your ring at my house. Or they might text your wife. You know, trying to be friends with your wife or befriending your wife or girlfriend, and they’ll start stalking you on the internet. They will. Some of them will physically stalk you. There are plenty of cases in movies made about this, based on actual cases where the woman will start stalking the man who rejected her, and it can be after even a one-night stand. We see these all the time with one-night stands for the client says, “Hey, I’m married. This is just for this TDY, which doesn’t go beyond this.” The woman says, “Oh, I understand.” It’s great when they go have this passionate love affair. Monday morning, that woman is showing up at the guy’s office to drop off some paperwork or to interject herself into his life by showing up at the kid’s school. And those are more passive-aggressive techniques, but they can begin to escalate. We’ve had cases where that guy continues to reject the woman, and the woman will eventually start threatening. We see this all the time, start dropping hints that maybe something that happened between them wasn’t consensual, maybe I had too much to drink, hey, you knew I took an Ambien, why did you take advantage of me? We need to meet up over coffee and talk this out. If that happens to you, you’re pretty much screwed. How you handle that from that point out can make or break your case, you need to document everything being said. You should not be apologizing and admitting to guilt. Because that person on the borderline is probably recording and capturing everything you say for use against you.

Avoid People with Borderline Personality Disorder

And it may be great. You could meet them for coffee, have her explain her side, you explain your side, and then you guys have sex in the car. And everything’s great again. You’re back to normal. And then she starts talking when you leave in your wife, hey, do you want to have coffee another day. It’s usually a love-hate relationship. When there’s hate going on when she hates on you, then it’s pretty intense. There are threats, I’m going to ruin your career, I’m going to destroy you to call your chain of command, sometimes they will show up at your commander’s office; we’ve had this app a couple of times, where you have a colonel who goes into he’s a member of the General Staff, he goes into the general’s office and guesses who’s sitting in the office talking to the general on the open door policy, about nothing in particular, but just one become thank the general for his service to the country. But doing it in a way so that the colonel with whom she had an affair will see her there, and then they’ll meet in the hallway.

People with Borderline Personality Disorder will Ruin Your Military Career.

This goes round and round, like the old; this is like the movie. It’s like the movie Fatal Attraction, where if you give in a little bit, everything’s great, again, very hot and passionate. But it’s impossible to separate yourself from that person. So again, read the book. I hate you don’t leave me. It’s terrifying. It’s a book written by psychiatrists who deal with these types of people with borderline personality disorder for many who have dealt with them for many years. It’s scary to read it, but it’s best for you and your family members and loved ones who know how to avoid these people. And so what ends up happening is that these things can continue. Let’s say the woman does get pregnant on the second encounter. That’s a prevalent tactic. That’s a widespread tactic. The old “Oh my god, I’m pregnant” trick is common. So now they have their claws in you for the rest of your life or, you know, for the child’s life. And they will keep coming around and keep harassing you. And their intention is often to get you not to leave them.

Red Flags for Borderline Personality Disorder

There’s a lot of red flags here. You meet someone that is like this. Be careful if they’re overly sexualized and throwing themselves at you. Honestly, you’re probably not that hot and good-looking in there. They’re not throwing themselves at you because you’re the coolest guy in the world. Men can be stupid. They take the bait every time, like, oh my God, this, this beautiful woman wants to just have sex with me in the backseat of a car. And I just met her 20 minutes ago. And she’s cool. I must. I must have some game. Maybe you do, maybe you don’t, or maybe you’re falling into a trap that you cannot escape. So in many of our cases that involve these types of women, they will not back down. We’ve had cases where the woman just when waived Article 32, or let’s say we don’t do the motions hearing or sub-do a victim interview, which we sometimes don’t do.

Naive JAG Prosecutors Almost Always Believe Women with Borderline Personality Disorder, Even When They Are 100% Lying

They want to know they’ll have the lawyer say, you don’t want to interview my client. You didn’t want to. Why didn’t you guys file this motion? Because the victim asks to see the accused, that motion talks about having the ultimate power. If you falsely accuse a lover who rejected you after a weekend of crazy sex, and you’re truly mentally, Oh, borderline personality disorder person. You throw this allegation out there. You can have control over and interject yourself into that service member’s life for one to three years. And sometimes it’ll happen, they’ll go to court, and they’ll be sitting there in court, and they want to be in court to watch it all. They want to be in there to watch the opening statements. They want to be an adult. And I see it all the time. And they’re sitting there watching the accused come and go out of court, watching his family like it’s sick. And they’ll start befriending his friends and family, wanting to wonder how he’s doing. And I’ve even had them reach out to these after, like a weekend affair with a client who rejected the woman quickly. And then the woman started stalking him. And I’ve had cases where that woman will start reaching out to the mother of my client who might be like a 60-year-old, retired school teacher, or a 70-year-old retired schoolteacher, and they get boom, a friend request from the woman who’s wanting to know how their day was and wanting to stop by and get to know them. This is stalker behavior.

Borderline Personality Disorder and Stalking

To avoid these types of people at all costs. If you’re in a situation where anyone drops hints that they’ll accuse you, you ruin your career or destroy yourself. Remember what I’m saying in this video, and you need to get someone to advise you and guide you out of the situation. Somebody was experienced in these cases because they often go all the way to court. It ends up being a fully contested battle, where the alleged victim, the borderline personality disorder victim, who’s made a fake claim, will modify there testimony in their statements and in a way that fits our opening statement fits the cross-examination. And they’ll figure out from our motions, practice motions, file, what we’re arguing, what we’re saying. They will sometimes fabricate evidence that will come in with spliced-together recordings with fake text messages.

Borderline Personality Disorder and Destroying Military Careers

I have seen it all. The good thing is, if you do your work, you can expose these people fairly easily. If you’re experienced at it. Otherwise, they’re very intimidating. How do you cross-examine someone who is a crazy, manipulative liar? Who wants you to either be with them or want to see them in prison? Because if they can’t have you, then no one can? How do you cross-examine someone who has been practicing their entire life, how to lie, manipulate, and be deceptive, who the prosecution has coached? And the prosecution always believes these women? I’ve never had a prosecutor is like, yeah, you know what? This person is not telling the truth, even when we prove to them with evidence. They’re always like, well, look at her demeanor. Because a crazy person can cry on cue, a crazy mentally ill person can sit there and look you in the eye and say things.

Borderline Personality Disorder and Military Sexual Assault Allegations

I had this argument with a prosecutor the other day. I said that if I came up to you crying and said that I was attacked in the hallway by a member of Congress or by the judge, I would give a specific name. And I was crying and emotional. Based on that alone, would you prosecute that person put them in jail? And the guy said, No, no, I have to investigate. Did I say Why? Because if you’re prosecuting my client for it, you did nothing but take your word for it. And your decision to prosecute was based primarily on her demeanor. Like people cry all the time. Some people are very good at crime. Some people are crazy people who can cry, manipulate, and do all sorts of things and lie to your face.

People with Borderline Personality Disorder are Pathological Liars

It doesn’t mean that they’re telling the truth. So the bottom line is on this video, that borderline personality disorder, people are out there, people suffer from that it’s a severe, almost incurable mental illness, you can’t treat it with any drugs, it’s tough to treat with therapy. And it leads to an in is part of many military sexual assault allegations and fake or false military sexual assault allegations or rape claims. So if you’re in the military or civilian, and you’re falsely accused of sexual assault or falsely accused of rape, you need to talk to a lawyer that experience dealing with these types of crazy victims and mentally ill patients a cross-examining him, exposing them in front of the jury, because if you go in there with an amateur or someone who doesn’t know what they’re doing, you could be sitting in prison for a crime that you didn’t commit.
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